The following is a jumbled thought about the responsibility of the “artist”/ everyone living.

>>>Dec. 17, 2020

(w/ minor edits + additions)

Isn’t the whole point of making art to create a mirror? The artist is tortured because this work requires them to face themselves daily. Sometimes confronting things they don’t want to, but know they need to in order to create an image, an impression, a record of their personal existence. 

This existence can be/is torture for any awakened being. We are trapped in vessels we cannot change. Egos we cannot change. Brains we cannot change and personalities that may only shift slightly.

Our deepest desires unchangeable. Our spirit unchangeable. Our temperament and disposition only minority altered, learned and adjusted for. Slowly shifting through time, like car tires or a new pair of jeans.

Making art is recollecting, and slowly accepting all of the unchangeable that makes each of us who we are. It’s facing the pain of living without real control. It’s a sacrifice hung on a cross for society to witness in grief, in glory, or in gratitude. We do not want to accept the truths of our existence. In a world that does not serve us but rather one we must serve. Each being indebted to one another. As each must bear fruit of their own, for their own selves, to keep keeping on. To sustain their own life, and live in communion with others budding within the same struggle.

We cannot help one feed themselves. They must feed themselves. We can only act as mirrors, examples of the how-to. The alternative. The potential. The possibility. The guide, the god. This is the debt we pay.

This is the torture we face if we want to live honestly. But torture doesn’t have to take long. Every artist is responsible for how long the torture will take place. But it must be done.

(Essentially: We make mirrors of ourselves > for ourselves > for others. There is no shortcut. There is no escape)

((maybe I’m wrong. maybe I’ll turn around and change my mind. let’s mark the time and continue))

If one only looks in, they will lose their light. If one only looks out, they will lose their purpose. The purpose is to serve others by serving yourself. The light is what lifts you to do it.

Anyone getting this?

- K

points of some regard